Words cannot describe how much I am attracted to this picture
(Source: , via trekbedtimestories)
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Words cannot describe how much I am attracted to this picture
(Source: , via trekbedtimestories)
It had been almost a year since Leonard had last talked to Jim.
to be more exact it had been almost a year since Leonard had broken the news to Jim that he needed to get away from space and had left Starfleet and Jim without so much as a number to forward his messages to.
Almost a year had gone by and Leonard had regretted leaving ever day. He didn’t know how to go back. He’d just walked away, not only from the crew but from Jim. And Jim had never come after him. He didn’t know what he expected when he picked up his COMM and dialed Jim’s old subspace frequency. He still knew it by heart. It rang for a tense moment before it connected to his voice mailbox.
This is Jim Kirk. If you’re calling about crew movie night, it’s still on. If it’s tuesday night I’m playing chess with Spock. If you’re starfleet brass I suggest you use my official line. If it’s anyone else, well you know what to do. And if this is Bones…. I still love you.
Bones gasped in shock, belatedly swiping at the disconnect key. He’d half expected the line to be dead. He stared at his broken whiskey glass on the floor which he hardly remember dropping. The only thought that crossed his mind was that after all this time, Jim still loved him. He’d hung on for this long, what kind of love that must be Bones didn’t know, but he sure knew he’d never experienced it before. And he knew why Jim hadn’t stopped him; Jim loved him too much to ask him to stay somewhere he was miserable. Jim had forgiven Bones the moment he left despite what it cost him. Bones knew he’d made a terrible mistake.
Three days later he called again .
This is Jim Kirk. If it’s friday night I’m writing reports and first thing saturday I’m headed out on shore leave all weekend long, But I’ll call you back when I get home on Sunday afternoon. P.S. if this is Bones. I still love you.
Before he could chicken out Bones left his number. And not another word. And then he waited by his COMM all Sunday with a worried frown. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been this nervous.
When it rang, this is what Jim heard:
If you’re callin’ ‘bout my heart, It’s still yours.
I should’ve listened to it a little more. Then it wouldn’t have taken me so long to know where I belong. And by the way, kid, this is no machine you’re talkin’ to.
Can’t you tell, this is me, and I still love you.
A galaxy away and Bones can hear Jim’s choked sob loud and clear. It rips through him like a lightening bolt and suddenly they’re both in tears together.
Bones wishes he could reach through the COMM link and hold Jim. He’ll still have to wait a few days for that, but he smiles because he knows he finally coming home.
[inspired by this song]
It’s five months almost to the day since they broke up when Jim receives the message. He stares at it for a long time, emotions warring within him. He knows it’s a bad idea but the message just says that they should meet up as their shore leave conveniently matches up.
He repeats to himself all the reasons they broke up. Bones taking a position that stations him permanently on a planet means that they wouldn’t see each other for a year and Jim can’t do long distance relationships. In true Jim Kirk style, he’d sabotaged the relationship instead, because if he’s going to lose Bones he’s going to do it on his own goddamn terms.
It’s five months since Jim ended it all, citing a whole host of reasons that weren’t the real ones and Bones, hurt and confused, had left the Enterprise.
Bones says they’ll meet as friends. Jim agrees. He tells everyone that they’re meeting up, but just as friends, because somehow that will steel his resolve against hazel eyes that see him far too clearly. He tells Uhura that he’s just going to have lunch with Bones, and her eyes say that if he does anything more she’ll gut him like a fish. He tells Spock that he’s definitely not in love with Bones anymore and that he just wants him around as a friend, and Spock looks at him like he knows Jim will get back with Bones the moment he opens his mouth.
And when Jim steps out of the shuttle and sees Bones, his heart does stop. He repeats to himself silently all the reasons why it won’t work and greets Bones with a cheerful smile and convinces himself it’s not weird not to greet him with a kiss.
They go for lunch and it’s so easy to talk about anything and everything. Jim repeats to himself t hat there are so many reasons he can’t be with Bones as he eats his fries and drinks another beer and ignores the way that Bones’ eyes have become brighter with alcohol.
They see a film and it makes Bones laugh and all Jim wants to do is put his arm around him to feel his shoulders shake. He repeats to himself that long distance relationships don’t work, that he is an asshole anyway, that he’d probably cheat on Bones or Bones would not wait for him or that it’s unfair to ask him to.
They leave the theater and Bones goes quiet then. Jim is heading back to the shuttle and Bones suggests they just have one more drink. Jim suggests a busy bar, because he thinks it’ll steel his resolve somehow.
Silence descends when they’re there though, awkward and heavy. Around them people are laughing and joking and starting off their weekend. Jim watches the condensation on his glass while he thinks of what he can say. Eventually he can’ t stand the brooding silence any longer and he asks Bones to tell him what he’s thinking.
“You don’t want me to say. Not really Jim,” Bones stalls and Jim can only think of how much he’s missed that voice.
“You’re right, I probably don’t,” Jim says and Bones winces but the subject has been broached and it’s like the inevitable pull of the tide at that point.
“I don’t understand why we aren’t together, Jim. We were so goddamn perfect. I don’t have someone else I’d rather be with, neither do you. You’re the love of my life, you absolute asshole. I thought we could meet up as friends, but the moment I saw you I fell in love with you all over again,” Bones says and as he says it his eyes rise from the beer in front of them and meet Jim’s own.
Jim feels like he’s drowning.
“You can go Jim. Your shuttle leaves in twenty minutes. You can run ou t of here and I won’t follow you, or contact you again. Or you can stay. Drink with me. Be honest with me. Let’s fix this.”
He feels choked up, trapped. He doesn’t know what to say. He grips his glass tight and tries to remember how to breathe because here and now, he can’t remember all the reasons he repeated to himself. He can’t remember why this was a bad idea.
“Stay,” Bones implores and Jim swallows past the lump in his throat.
“It’s your round.”
Bones’ smile is blinding.
jim kirk is like the stray puppy that follows you home everyday and finally you are just so exasperated that your resolve crumbles and you take him inside to feed him and get him warm then the next thing you know he’s curled up in your bed wagging his tail and licking your face and you can’t get rid of him even though you never wanted the damn dog in the first place.
(Source: , via iship2muchshit)
“Jim, look, it’s your road.”
He glances up from the map he’s prodding on the PADD and squints against the sun. They’re a little turned around on their shore leave road trip. James Street is pretty common. Kirk Drive isn’t a far stretch.
Darling Road though, that’s a silly one, and it makes him grin and lean over to kiss Bones’ cheek.
“I don’t know, it’s kind of missing your twang,” Jim replies.
“Hmm, I guess so, darlin’,” Bones agrees.
Hmm, writing smut about Spock and McCoy having to share a room on shore leave and Spock thinking he’s gotten drunk, when actually he’s barely tipsy…
CMO’S LOG, STARDATE: UNLOGGED
Leonard H. McCoy, resigning due to unbelievable counts of middle name use and abuse by one James T. Kirk, effective immediately. McCoy out. McCoy out for good.
CMO’S LOG, STARDATE: WHO GIVES A DAMN
Leonard McCoy, resigning thanks to the attitude of a certain green-blooded cold-hearted heart-livered half-Vulcan who injured himself on a God-damned flower, I couldn’t make this hoo-ha up, and refuses treatment like any normal— [space limit reached]
CMO’S LOG, STARDATE: A STAR JUST BLEW UP
It blew up. That star exploded. It went full supernova right in front of us. Meanwhile, Captain James Tiberius Kirk remained on the nearest planet until fifteen minutes before the explosion. Fifteen minutes! Fifteen minutes… I need to sit dow n.
CMO’S LOG, STARDATE: I’M IN HELL
Jim, I oughta—
CMO’S LOG, STARDATE: AT LEAST I’M NOT THE SHIP’S TAILOR
Only man alive with more reasons to complain than me.
CMO’S LOG, STARDATE: HARRY MUDD
Leonard McCoy, tendering resignation due to that ding-dong’s mustache!
CMO’S LOG, STARDATE: WITCHES.
Somedays I have to wonder if I’m dreaming one long, unending nightmare… Might just call Spock “Toil” and Jim “Trouble” to make myself feel better. That is, if I don’t resign.
CMO’S LOG, STARDATE: PON FARR
All worth it to see that sour-faced Vulcan crack a smile for a change. Resigning now, ‘cause it won’t get better than this.
(via spockisgaypassito n)
Bondmates Spock and McCoy engage in some mischief (mindporn) on the bridge.
Takes place right before ‘Journey to Babel’.
It’s more like mind sexting than mind porn. Like, dirty talk but also not at all.
It’s good. Also they bicker slightly whilst narrating what they intend to do to one another which is adorable.